Welcome to Mercury Retrograde

The other night I was sitting on the couch drinking wine and eating a piece of bite-size frozen cheesecake when I thought about disengaging in the glories of my gluttony in favor of working on Rich’s recommendation letter.


Rich is a professor I had in college who created the environment where my cartoons came to life. Actually, I only started drawing cartoons after he assigned a 10-page fiction story and mine was only 7 1/2 pages. Naturally, I drew cartoons to fill up space instead of coming up with more words. Look where we are now… You just never know where life is gonna take ya…


Rich emailed me a few weeks back to ask if I would be interested in writing him a recommendation letter for the full-time creative writing position at Fairhaven College. Of course I told him I would. I mean, the guy is a major key figure in my literary career, the least I could do is write a letter.

So right when I was enjoying the glories, you know what happened? Rich texted me and ruined all the fun. He asked me how I was doing, but I knew he was really just wondering if I had even put a damn word down for his recommendation.


Nope, I haven’t. I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about it, though.

Sometimes when I can’t fall asleep, I listen to this astrologer’s podcast. So instead of using my insomniac phase to conquer Rich’s recommendation letter, I sat in my bed listening this stuff that causes me to think too much which then causes me to never fall asleep. Basically, this astrologer talks about what’s going on in the sky and how it’s going to influence our week ahead. Total bullshit, I know. I hate how much I like listening to it. Apparently on Monday, Mercury went into retrograde. I fucking hate when Mercury goes into retrograde. All the stupid people blame everything on it. People kill me. Sometimes I find myself blaming my shit on Mercury retrograde and then I just hate me.


I took a trip up to Bonners Ferry today with Mom and Katie. Katie is my older sister. I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned her before, so now you know. We ate lunch at this hip spot called Under the Sun. I got a cup of soup and a Greek salad. Katie got a tuna fish panini with extra pickles because she is pregnant. Mom got a panini too, but I didn’t pay attention to what kind she got. Katie also got a huckleberry dessert and boy, was it delicious! She actually shared, which is very rare because Katie never shares food.

Across the street from Under the Sun is a neat little bookstore called Bonners Books. It’s a very cool bookstore. You walk in and a little bell dings and an old man with silver hair and glasses greets you. I swear, all booksellers look like Dumbledore to me… All the good ones at least. The floors are covered in old wood and there’s a little black cat that roams around the store. It mostly leaves you alone, so it’s not creepy or magical or anything. It’s just there.


I left with a few good books. I picked up a copy of Oh, the Places You’ll Go! by Dr. Seuss for my little nephew. For me, I left with an old copy of Mark Twain’s The Diary of Adam and Eve, which I didn’t even know existed. Mark Twain is very funny and I think it will be good reference for the book I’ve been working on. I also left with old copies of Franny and Zooey by J.D. Salinger (so hip, I know) and also Slaughterhouse-Five by Vonnegut because I’ve never actually read it, not even for school.

So that’s it, there you have it. Mercury retrograde has not destroyed me yet. We’ve got until January 8th though, so I will keep you updated.






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